April 14, 2003

It has been a while (over 2 months) since I saw a rainbow or had any divine signs from Sri Skanda. As such, I became depressed and wandered whether or not Lord Skanda is still with me and watching over me or has He been turned away from me due to my imperfect nature because I am afflicated with the disease of desire.

In tune to the way I was feeling, I began to sing two Thiruppugal songs by Sri Arunagirinathar. In the first song, “Aarumugam Aarumugam,” Sri Arungirinathar describes the evil karmas that are afflicting him and pleads to Lord Murugan to help get rid of them with His Vel.

In the second song, “Anisevvi yaar,” Sri Arungirinathar describes the mental obstacles of anger, ego, women, wealth, lust, etc. which prevent him from being with Lord Murugan and as a result, cause Arungirinathar undue sufferings. As such, Arunagirinathar beseechs Bhagavan Skanda to shower even a little grace on him to help alleviate his sufferings.

In both of these songs, I found myself completely in tune with what Sri Arunagirinathar was saying, which probably why Sri Skanda is not showing His Grace to me. But, I am trying to overcome this disease of desire that I am infected with. When I will be cured, only He knows. In the mean time, I can only try and continue to pray and hope the light of Sri Skanda’s love will burn to ashes my insatiable desires.

After singing these songs and crying for my wrong doings, I went to sleep. In my dream, I was walking along a dirt road. I remember being melancholic and debilitated with no hope of a cure of this disease of desire that continues to eat away at me day-by-day. As I was proceeding along, I happened to approach a house on the right side of the road.

Suddenly, a beautiful lady opened the door and came out of the house and smiled at me. I was wondering why she was smiling at me? She then beckoned me to come to her house. She said,”I have something to show you.” As I proceeded towards her, she took me around the back of the house, pointed to the sky and said,”Look.”

In the sky was a very beautiful and enormous rainbow. It was unlike one I have ever seen before. It was amost cartoon-like in appearance with very high contrast and rich colours. Normally, rainbows in the sky are a little faded – but this rainbow was very vibrant in its colours and it descended from the sky and landed a few feet in front of me. I was speechless and taken away by its beauty. The girl disappeared and I awoke.

I didn’t realize this dream until I began to sing the same Thiruppugal songs I sang the night before, “Aarumugam Aarumugam” and “Anisevvi yaa.” It was then when I suddenly remembered the details of the dream I had last night and the words from Sri Skanda’s lessons which I received by email from the Skandagurunatha.org website a few days ago.

In Lesson 25: Release Fears Through Love, Lord Skanda says:

In “My children, if you see a rainbow in the sky, in a dream, in a vision or meditation, in a book or even on a television, remember me, and remember our victory of good over evil. Then know that I am with you. When you see the rainbow, say my mantra thrice.”

Not having said His mantra thrice in the dream, I said it during my morning prayers and cried happy tears knowing that Sri Skanda heard my prayers and heart-felt cry for His grace; and to know how quickly He responded. What shall I say of His graciousness????

Oh Muruga!